I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
