Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I have peed in a lot of sinks
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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