I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
