She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
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