After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
