Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
porn star boner night. come get it.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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