we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
When are your genitals available?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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