did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
