remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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