He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
