we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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