he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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