No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
