In the future we'll all be gay
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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