i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
