Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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