I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize