Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
