i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
