Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Found your dick twin last night
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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