she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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