You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
