I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
