When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
They have beer where we have blood.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
