We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize