gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
