talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
We had sex on a dog bed..
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
