I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I think i got beer on your cat.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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