Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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