I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
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