He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize