Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
