My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
