i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Randomize
