I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
