i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
