just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
