if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
