What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
