i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
