Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Dignity is for republicans.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
the room spins SO much faster in panama
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize