I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
is wine microwaveable?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
