Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
