DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
