READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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