You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
