He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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