Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
