girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
