we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
