ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
